The Ostroy Report

The Ostroy Report is a fresh, aggressive voice for Democrats and a watchdog of the GOP/Tea Party. We support President Obama and the Democratic agenda and seek to preserve the Senate majority while taking back the House. But we're also not afraid to criticize the left when necessary.

Thursday, May 11, 2006

"Distract the Bastards '06," Our Secret Weapon for Winning in November


Let's start a movement called "Distract the Bastards '06." On election day this November, Democrats should underhandedly set up distractions in closely contested areas that lure Republicans away from the voting booth. For example, free NASCAR jacket giveaways in Virginia. All-day hunting contests in Texas, with big prize money. Free all-you-can-eat religious-themed barbecues in Ohio. Carnivals in Georgia, Mississippi, Alabama and elsewhere with surefire enticements like dunk-the-gay-guy booths and redneck vs. abortionist paintball matches. Or how about Indian reservation casino trips in Nevada, Arizona and Wyoming, where we ply 'em with endless buckets of nickels to play slots all day. These events would typically be held in the most far-reaching rural areas where access to the polls is extremely limited. We'll get 'em all liquored up, feed 'em lots of charcoaled beef and pork products, and give 'em lots of free stuff they'd normally kill for. We'll show these folks more fun than they've had since pulling those gay-marriage amendment levers back in '04. They'll be so drunk, bloated and exhausted that they'll have no desire or strength left to vote.

Distract the Bastards '06. Our secret weapon for winning the midterms.

15 Comments:

  • At 12:13 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    i hate your blog, and disagree with your views. why am i allowed to do this? the same reason you are allowed to voice your opinions against any and all conservative views/ideas/policies. elect a socialist if you want. or move to spain...they've already done that for you.

     
  • At 12:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Kind of funny, but the right has already perfected the absentee ballot famliy scam. That's when the patriarch of the family fills out all the absentee ballots for the voters in the family; their teen's and even granny with alzheimer's, who voted for McGovern.

     
  • At 12:52 PM, Anonymous Cathy said…

    To Anoymous above:

    If you don't like the blog, why read it and respond?

    If you opened your mind, you would see why only 32% support the worst president in history. Why are you so out of touch with reality?

    Yep, the Repubs are going to use their good old social issues to get the blinded right wingers to get all bent out of shape and vote as the country goes farther and farther down the drain.

    But thank God the gays won't be able to marry.

    What a bunch of blinded people support and run this once great country!

    Cathy

    From the once great, but Blue, State of Michigan

     
  • At 1:10 PM, Anonymous johnny said…

    Yup, I’m still here in Dumbfuckistan some times called Florida, where the extreme Right are still WRONG. If it wasn’t for the liberal Miami area (home of the nude and topless beaches) this state would be over run by religious nuts and rednecks. I live in the St. Petersburg area where the average age is deceased.

    On election day we can tell these people that there are free tattoos and beer all day long, just wait in line. Wal-Mart will be giving away free NASCAR tickets and selling cheap gas, just wait in line. All stray shopping carts will have a bounty of $25.00 just return them to the store they walked off from, this will keep have the population busy checking the lakes and rivers, alleys and trailer parks for days. These are just a few ideas but you know Andy I think you have a great idea, I just think the GOP will be so far down by this fall that we won’t need these tactics.

     
  • At 2:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    How about "Free Lap Dances for Republicans" Day nationwide... (Just get in line and show your voter registration card.)
    Brilliant post yet again. If only we could actually make it happen,

     
  • At 3:02 PM, Blogger Bill Garnett said…

    Humm, I can agree with your views, I can massage your ego by telling you how clever you are with your repartee, and I could pile onto the right wing bashing that might give me temporary solace – but, does this work?

    If I want people with authoritarian conservative mind sets to give my point of view a fair shake, perhaps I also have to give them the same courtesy. I’m suggesting a little less fire and a lot more light. It’s perhaps natural for anyone, conservative or liberal, when attacked to just throw up more and more defensives and to become more and more wary of each other.

    One alternative, besides just listening a bit more, would be to search for areas of commonality, to be positive when some facsimile of common sense, fair-mindedness, or intelligent discourse is shown. After all, there is one common denominator for all of us – we are all Americans – we also subscribe to at least one common concept – “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

    We may preach to the choir all day long and only bolster our own – but perhaps to engage in civil dialogue, our disparate populations could see more commonality. And that is something we all can do in our own spheres of influence – with our family and friends and neighbors and colleagues. And calm and frank discussions with our representatives, clergy, and community leaders. And even approach red blogs respectfully and take this message: Shadows of the future that are approaching America are ominous, and it may well take all of us – red and blue together – to best deal with these coming threats.

    Respectfully submitted by someone who is not anonymous and who is available to any conservative who wants to bring us together as a nation – by blog, by email, by phone call – or just knock on my door.

    Bill Garnett 804 897-9274

     
  • At 4:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    To Bill Garnett- Respectfully.
    Sounds like a nice world that you describe and I wish we lived in it but we don't. Democrats are problematically "nice" when conservatives lie, cheat, swindle, mob attack, personal attack, commit crimes/treason and set nations to war based on lies. Love and understanding, hearing each other - unfortunately does not work alone above the din. Fire is necessary. Fire is finally, down-to-our-last straw, necessary. Change did not come in the South in the 60's because two sides regarded each other with respect. It was the fire that led the way.

    -Just a middle-aged bloke in PA. Please forgive if I do not post my name. That is my option.

     
  • At 6:08 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I like freedom, from FASCISM! Update to cathy's figure: now spiralling past 31%.
    >>elect a socialist if you want. or move to spain...
    Note to self, try to read blog posts that do more than rehash vietnam era sentiments like love it unquestioningly or leave it to the slow learners

     
  • At 8:20 AM, Anonymous Cathy said…

    Note to Anoymous:

    Perhaps it is you who should move to a fascist theocratic country. Where is that you ask?

    MOVE TO THE MIDDLE EAST!!!!!

    THIS IS MY COUNTRY. YOU SIR, HAVE NO RIGHT TO DESTROY IT.

    BUSH IS NOW BELOW 30%.

    IF I WERE YOU, I WOULDN'T EVEN ADMIT TO BEING A REPUB. AND I CERTAINLY WOULD NOT PUT DOWN THE VIEWS OF THE HUGE MAJORITY OF AMERICANS THAT LOVE THIS COUNTRY.

    WAKE UP AND LISTEN TO THE HUGE MAJORITY OF AMERICANS WHO ARE SPEAKING LOUD AND CLEAR!!!!

    CATHY
    FROM THE ONCE GREAT STATE OF MICHIGAN AND THE ONCE GREAT COUNTRY OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.

     
  • At 11:22 AM, Anonymous johnny said…

    That a girl Cathy, no more Mr/Mrs nice guy when it comes to dealing with the republicans, we should have learned this in 2000 and 2004.

    New York Times has Bush at 29% and now with this weeks screwup from the WH with the NSA it'll drop even further.

    Have you had enough yet?

     
  • At 2:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    It cracks me up when GOPers get upset over someone pointing out their stereotype. When the rest of us, in moments of sheer disgust, would like to see them load their family values and god fearing paranoia into the minivan and drive over the cliff, we still are facists, according to them, if we don't toe their party line. We are now at the point where the rest of us don't care what they have to say - because it's stupid.

    Let them huddle in their paranoid little world. Us awful liberals will be out making a positive difference in the country and the world.

     
  • At 1:20 AM, Blogger Scoppertop said…

    Hey Andy--

    I hate living in Dumbfuckistan. A prospective business partner told me today that she was a staunch Bush supporter. I didn't have time to ask her what kind of person would still like Bush after all he's done. Truth -- these middle class people in Atlanta with kids in private schools don't know that Bush has done anything wrong. They watch Fox.

     
  • At 8:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Has anyone ever noticed how both fearless leaders have that contemptuous smirk that everyone above 29% would like to wipe off their face.

    I won't mention any names, but their initials are, Dick Cheney and George W. Bush.

    duh!

     
  • At 8:18 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Bush-Whacked!

    A pathetic bunch of losers consisting of organized crime that act like a corrupt syndicate.

    I retract this statement and comparison, as organized crime has unsung scruples, flair, and somewhat respectful dignity.

    The Bush Regime is nothing less than a pool of rancid shit, whoop's (excrement) to put it mildly.

     
  • At 12:31 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    While I agree that it sux to live in Dumbfuckistan...I feel the small breezes of change in my area. Gone are a bunch of Bush/Cheney bumperstickers. Missing are the support our troops magnetic loops. Rethug. incumbents are being challenged by their own and Democratic candidates. Talk of losing the old Rethug. guard in Congress is springing up among Rethug voters! True, some of those bumper stickers and magnetic thingys were stuck all over F-350s, Durangos, and minivans that are no longer affordable to drive...and true, talk is just talk, but at least it is happening to the clueless bunch that mindlessly vote GOP. It's sooo rewarding to see a family of six crammed into dad's commuter Nissan on their way to church. Do you suppose they've picked up a clue that their Grand Old Party has bitten them in the butt???

     

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