The Ostroy Report

The Ostroy Report is a fresh, aggressive voice for Democrats and a watchdog of the Republican Party and its President-elect Donald Trump.

Friday, April 07, 2006

GOP Afflicted With New Disease: Gonorrhea Lectim


News from The Center for Disease Control and Prevention is circulating the 'Net Friday stating that the Republican Party has contracted a new virulent strain of a
sexually transmitted disease called Gonorrhea Lectim (pronounced "gonna re-elect him)", which is contracted through dangerous and high risk partisan greed, cronyism and corruption. Several GOP leaders previously or currently running for re-election have been politically crippled by this debilitating condition, including Tom DeLay, Bob Ney, Rick Santorum, John Boehner and Duke Cunningham. Other high-ranking ReTHUGlicans including Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld and Rice seem to have contracted a version of the dreaded illness as well.

Cognitive characteristics of individuals infected include:

-Anti-social personality disorders
-Delusions of grandeur with messianic overtones
-Extreme cognitive dissonance
-Inability to incorporate new information
-Pronounced xenophobia and paranoia
-Inability to accept responsibility for own actions
-Cowardice masked by misplaced bravado
-Uncontrolled facial smirking
-Ignorance of geography and history
-Tendencies towards evangelical theocracy
-Categorical all-or-nothing behavior

Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed at how this
destructive disease originated only a few years ago
from a bush found in Texas.

1 Comments:

  • At 4:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    God, that is soooo funny. And so apt. Andy, did you do that all by yer lonesome?? I'm sending it on, hon....FABUTRON!!!!

     

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